Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Not sure What I'm fighting For Anymore

As I've been reading these past weeks, the thing that strikes me again and again is the evidence against the catholicity of the CEC. So many are saying that we are Anglican (which I don't believe is true - we just simply do not have any roots in the Church of England) or that we are Protestant. This just isn't what we signed up for. When we came into the CEC we came in as Roman Catholics excited to find a catholic expression of convergence worship. What made it a catholic expression was the episcopal govt and the orthodox teachings of the church. The apostolic succession was important to us - and still is. We were hopeful to see that we could perhaps have co-communion with our RC brothers and sisters yet not be bound by the difficulties which plague the RC church. It was the best of both worlds to us.

God called me clearly and with much heart-rending difficulty into the RC church. Once there I embraced it with joy even though I saw many flaws but I'd been around enough blocks to know that there is no perfect church. We came into the CEC when we moved to a new town and needed to start over with a new church family. The CEC was young and exciting and captured the catholicity in us perfectly. Now it seems to be becoming something else. The apostolic succession is no longer important to the leadership, it seems. Being able to commune with all the church universal is no longer a goal. "Orthodox" teachings have become chains to tie the laity's hands. This isn't what I signed up for and I'm beginning to wonder if the CEC was ever what we thought she was. Either she has gone far adrift in ten years or we were deluded from the beginning. I am sad to say I want out. I'm willing to fight a bit on my way out but what, exactly, am I fighting for? To make the CEC back into what it once was or to force it into a mold it never filled in the first place?

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